I've been trying to figure out the best way to write you for the past few days. I finally just decided that I can't put it off, it's time to catch up.It's been a full year today (Nov.22nd) since you've gone and yeah, you've been missed. A lot. I still remember our last Sunday night call and will never forget it. I never told you enough how much I looked forward to that call. It is and was always the best way to kick off my week.
Sure, we've visited a few times in the past year. And I've always tried to catch you up on things when Michelle and I came to see you.
And it's getting busy again.
The first part of the year was a challenge. I had a few health issues early in the year and it was a little scary. Turns out I have the same problem you did: Vasovagal Syncopathy. I passed out twice (both times at Hospital) and spent some time in Intensive Care. It really sucked. The second time I passed out, I landed on my head and got a really bad concussion. I'm not sure I've ever been more scared about my own mortality.
It took a couple of weeks for the concussion symptoms to go away. Quite possibly one of the weirdest feelings/experiences of my life.
And then there was my foot. I had a pretty big bone spur on my heel that I had to get removed. That was a little more routine, it was a tamer version of my ankle surgery. The procedure was a success.
Finally there was my shoulder. You always told me I'd have problems when I got older if I kept carrying around the big camera.
You were right.
I hurt my rotator cuff, again. This time it was a small tear, but I lost all strength in my right arm for about two weeks. We thought it might lead to surgery, but I was able to rehabilitate it. But not before I had an MRI. The doctor looked at it and just kind of smiled. He said "You're lucky. You have a very small tear, but it should heal without surgery. But you also have arthritis and the tendons are pretty worn." I didn't laugh, but all I could think of was your warning.
Thankfully, my health has improved. A lot. I've lost 40 pounds since last fall (2012). I'm down to just over 220 and to be honest, am in the best shape I've been since I was at Lake Brantley. I ran in another 5K this summer and did really well and I'm in the gym 3-times a week. But the thing you'll be happiest about is changing my diet. I don't drink sweet tea at all. I'm very careful about what I eat and how much I eat. And boy, it's really made a difference.
Work has been really good. I love the people I work with, they are an absolute blast, I really look forward to going in and teaming up with them. My role continues to evolve, I'm trying to come up with more stories to do, some days it's harder than others, but I keep pushing forward.I get to go to California in a couple of weeks. Work is sending me there as part of a team looking to add new 4K video technology to The Network. It should be a great learning experience and I'm really looking forward to the project.
As for Michelle, she's doing good. She really misses you though. As much as I loved talking with you, I think she may have loved it more. And she, like me, thinks about you…a lot.
She continues doing amazing things at work. She's launched at least 3 more of her websites and has become quite the Producer of Videos. I always get a laugh about that, I'm sure you are too, never thought she'd start moving into my world, but she is.She still travels a lot, but not as much as last year (or so it seems). And she's very close to getting her Gold Status back. You'd be proud. She got us a free flight to Louisiana last month and we've yet to pay for the hotel we stay at in Lafayette. We always use points to pay for it.
You'll be glad to know we are working on a plan to move her mom up here. Gale's actually open to it now. We've just gotta find the right fit and put our game plan in action. We're hoping she'll be here by this time next year.
Rosie is doing well. She's 2 now and starting to become a grown up pup. You taught me very well about raising dogs, but I'm still a softie most of the time. Still, Rosie is a sweetheart, you'd love spending time with her, though she has Daisy's wild streak. Only more amplified.
The cat, well, Oliver is Oliver. He seemed to really like you when you visited with him. And he doesn't get clingy with many visitors. He's still fat, but hasn't gotten bigger. He's sort of stabilized…
Both Oliver and Rosie are sitting with me now as write this in the loft, they both follow me everywhere I go, but that shouldn't surprise you. Plus it's Rosie's dinner time.Oh, by the way, you'd be happy to hear the Braves are moving closer to us in Smyrna. The team just announced they are going to build (along with the County) a new stadium and entertainment complex at the I-75/I-285 interchange.
Yes, I'll pass by it every day heading to work.
If they actually pull this off, you'd probably love the idea. You always used to tell me you'd have gone more to games if there were something to do around the stadium. And you do know I always knew that you liked going to the games, even if you wouldn't admit it. I never got to tell you how much I appreciated you coming with me to the games when I'd come visit. It meant more to me than you'll ever know.
Yeah, I know that's a lot, but it's been a year now, and honestly, I didn't even get into everything.
There's a lot going on now, you know what they are. But you also know how much of a motivator you were when times were like this. And yes, we all draw a lot of strength from it. Again, probably more than you'd think.
I've had to step into your shoes for some of this and I'll be really honest. It's very strange to me. I don't think I'm not up to the task, it's just different. It's an adjustment. I didn't ever have to worry about watching out for everyone much because you usually took care of it.
Sure, there were exceptions, like when you had your cancer battle, but I'm not sure back then I could handle what I've got to do now. But I'm very sure I'm up to it now. You probably have no idea how much I learned from watching you deal with that and other things. I learned a lot. A lot about you and a lot about our family, but I also learned a lot about myself. You also told me once you've never met anyone who "Learned so much by watching others" as I did. That's exactly what happened.
Between that and Michelle being there to keep me humble, focused and grounded, I'm trying to make things better for everyone the best I can. And I will continue to do that. I'm very sure I'll make some mistakes, but like always I'll learn and not repeat them. I'll get better at it. I will continue living what you always told me, "Take what you think is a weakness and make it a strength". I have to.
Most of all, I just wanted to tell you how much I miss you. As much as we all move on, as much as things change I just want you to continue to be proud. As many times you tried to tell me we were different, we were--and are more than same than either one of us ever thought we'd be.
Much love and we'll come visit you in a couple days,
Phil
This is forever attached to you:
