Reality for some unknown reason means different things to different people. What is perfectly normal to one person makes absolutely no sense to someone else. Of course there are the "Always Grounded" people to whom everything makes sense, there is a rational explanation and can always have a good solution to any problem.
My Grandmother was one of those "Always Grounded" people. I suspect that there are a lot of people who can say that, but since this is my blog and my story for our purposes here, she will be the only one.
((My Grandparents at Christmas Dinner 2004//Courtesy: Me))
I bring this up for a reason. She passed away this past Friday. As with everything that she did, she passed away quietly...on her own terms. And as I write this, my wife and I are getting ready to go to her funeral service.
Nobody has all of the answers to everything, it takes some people longer than others to figure this out, but in time...most do. My Grandmother came pretty damn close to having those answers. Yes, we were close and talked about a lot of things, but no, I didn't ask or talk to her about everything. Maybe I should have because I suspect she would have had a perfectly rational answer for whatever it was that I would have asked.
It was tough for her the past few years. My Grandfather passed away in 2005. My mother, her oldest daughter, moved away in 2007. Her youngest daughter, my Aunt, moved in with her in 2007 and basically took on the responsibility for her care. Her middle kid, her son...caused her a lot of consternation. She really loved him and wanted him to be part of the family, her family was very close...but he chose to stay distant, rarely communicating and rarely checking on her and her health. It was tough.
My sister and I were very close to Gram, always were. She and Gramp ended up with us or near us pretty much from about 1980 on. They were always around and always the characters. If ever 2 people were made for each other, it was them. They weren't the same but they were. They fit together like puzzle pieces and really, truly...what could be more perfect than that?
I was around for her too. She told me...a lot...one of the last things she wanted was for me to finally get married and be happy. She got to see that when I got married in 2007. It took a lot for her to be at the ceremony, but she was there, in her wheelchair with a "HUGE" smile on her face. Not only was she there, but everyone that was there came by, visited and talked to her. She told me how much she enjoyed that, how important it was and I told her that it was the same feeling for me.
She was 90 years old when she passed away, 90 good years. No, she wasn't always the "Always Grounded" person, but she always had a plan. She did something that not a lot of people can do these days. She helped raise and nurture a very good, very strong family. As much as some parts of the "Family" say that we are "Odd" we aren't. We are about as normal as they come. We are very grounded, we are tight knit. We keep up with each other and offer each other advice. We do and we know things that only family would know. We know it because that is the way that she molded us. That is the way she nurtured us. That is the way she advised us.
She will be missed but not in a sad way. She got what she wanted and did what she wanted. Really, if you think about it, maybe it's a somewhat simplistic sentiment but really it's what makes you happy and makes you proud...is there anything else more important than that?
Enjoy some Rolling Stones singing "You Can't Always Get What you want". Thanks You Tube
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